Camping is a popular way to spend your holidays. Some might even say it is an excellent way to make some good memng that you can throw in the faces of those friends of yours who won’t stop talking about how they had such a  great weekeories at a reduced cost. But the truth is that camping is a horrible thing to do. So here are 9 reasons to not go campind camping.

–             Beasts everywhere

It scratches, it rubs, it swarms, and it squeaks, sings, squeals, bleats and craws… Camping means leaving the security of concrete to face the rudest creatures of the animal kingdom.

–            It’s not comfy

The Windigo camping kit packs air mattresses, a cooler, a camping stove that’s easy to use, hygienic blankets , camping dishes, enough soaps to do everything you need and the necessary equipment to dry your clothes… But no Jacuzzi. Might as well stay at the hotel.

–            You can’t get a good reception

What if your boss wants to call you? What if you need to call your banker ? Even the simplest things like checking your e mails or ordering sushi become impossible to do. Sure, most camping sites offer all the Wi-Fi you need, but how are you supposed to find them without Google Maps!

–            Setting up a tent is hard

We don’t all have the patience of Gandhi but that is pretty much what you need to get through such a mess of ropes and poles. And you’ll inevitably end up with a small piece of plastic, wondering where it is supposed to fit.

–            You meet people

In Canada, campers are polite, nice, they even smile. They will interrupt your walk just to greet you, and won’t miss an occasion to get to know you a little. So even though there are more than 423 000 camping sites in Canada, there is no way to be left alone.

–             Campfire songs

If your friends are less exhausted than you after a long day hiking, they might want to sing a bit. So here you are, forced to listen to them butchering your favorite songs. A little word of advice: make sure no one brings a guitar or it will be worse.

–              Flips-Flops are allowed

And this is probably the most important reason not to go camping. Once the tent is set up, your friends will indeed behave in a way you could never have imagined: they’ll put on their stupid hats, giant glasses, shirts with unspeakable patterns and of course… Flip flops. Now all the pictures are ruined.

–              Your friends think themselves adventurous

Spending a night in a tent becomes an odyssey and getting a fire going feels like a mystical experience. Every single one of them will try to play the smart guy,  setting the tent up alone, pretending to be able to read the map, insisting on carrying the heaviest bags. Seriously, if it weren’t for the equipment kit, you know they wouldn’t step out of the car.

–              You want to more

The very worst with camping trips, is that they are always too short. As soon as you’re back to your home, one starts to plan the next destination. And as soon as you’re back on the road, one starts planning the next holidays.

As you see, there are no good reasons what so ever to go camping: being close to nature, in a comfortable tent, forced to disconnect from your everyday life and enjoy the pure air of the wild. All for the excuse of sharing good moments with the people you hold dear.  No seriously, let’s just all stay home.

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